Comments on: The Love We Take, The Love We Make

By: Susan Pogorzelski

Susan Pogorzelski — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 00:00:03 +0000

Thank you, Farouk! I appreciate the comment

By: Farouk

Farouk — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 08:57:49 +0000

i like your writing style, keep it up

By: Susan Pogorzelski

Susan Pogorzelski — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 18:14:05 +0000

Elisa: I can completely understand where you are coming from. I think, for me, a lot of that being closed off, why it takes such a long while to be completely open and myself with people, is because of that similar fear. I’m finding that the more time that passes wherein I rely on myself and only myself, the more I find it difficult to put…I don’t know exactly what to call it. Trust? Faith? in others. Trust that they’ll feel the same way towards you. Faith that it won’t lead to more hurt and more loss. You’re absolutely right — it’s scary to put your heart on the line, to bare your soul, when you can’t control the outcome.

Walls are so easy to build and harder to tear down because it’s experience that’s the brick and mortar. It’s hard to find someone who is willing (and able — as you so correctly say) to reciprocate those feelings — maybe that’s what makes it so special when you do.

I’m beginning to think, more and more, that everyone has a wall. Maybe it varies in thickness or height, but I think everyone has something that we hide behind, as experience has taught us.

Maybe that’s the thing, too — maybe it takes a lifetime of experiences building one on top of another to knock that wall down. Whatever the reason, however it works, I hope that wall lets a little light in to you…And a lot of your light and love out to the rest of the world. You have a good heart — too good to be sheltered away. I know fear all too well, but I also know that there are those who will love you for everything you have to offer and we can’t hold ourselves back.

Keep knocking down those walls, Elisa.

By: Susan Pogorzelski

Susan Pogorzelski — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 17:37:11 +0000

Dani: Here’s where I admit that I’ve tried and tried and tried to watch Love, Actually, but I just can’t get into it. For you, maybe I’ll try again, but there’s just something about it. Think it’s kind of like A Christmas Story for me…Everyone I know loves it and I hate it.

Now, the message behind Love, Actually, I adore. It’s true that our culture is so focused on romantic love, isn’t it? When I was in France, I learned the value of independence– I went to cafes by myself, for walks by myself…I even took that trip by myself. And yet, everything from dinner to movies to getaways here is set for groups of two or more. The thought of being together and sharing these things with someone is absolutely beautiful. But I think I’ve learned so much more about myself by realizing that love isn’t just romantic. There’s loving family, loving friends, and loving yourself.

That last one is the biggie — the one that sometimes it takes a lifetime to learn.

I can only hope that more people would see the love that’s right around them. I love your comments, Dani…They always get me thinking about the subject in a different light! Thanks!

By: Elisa

Elisa — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 16:55:18 +0000

The scariest part of romantic love (for me) is the putting yourself out there. I have never been the first to say “I love you,” rarely discuss my feelings and tend to shrug off closeness with coy playfulness. My family, in fact, will joke that when things get too emotioney or real (in any situation) I shut down. Generally they’ll say “Uh oh, too real” or “Too. Much. Feeling.”

I realized recently that this comes from a long while of being conditioned to put my feelings and emotions and heart out for peopl and not receive the reciprocation. This is most likely from dating or liking people that were never going to be capable of that in the first place. Still, each time it happens it almost seems to add another brick to the wall. That popular wall that keeps people out.

But unfortunately I know all too well that the wall keeps you in too.